I just finished “Evvie Drake Starts Over” by Linda Holmes. Wow. Loved it. Once I got started, I couldn’t put it down. Chick Lit that hit home. Evvie’s marriage was so much like mine that it hurt at times.
She was leaving her husband, literally, when she got the phone call he was in a car accident that ended up being fatal. I am ashamed to confess that I dreamed many a night of my Ex dying in a DUI accident when he stayed out late drinking.
Her husband was charming to everyone, mine often was as well. Everyone thought their marriage was perfect. Mine also. So many similarities. His temper, his denial of basic facts. She was also a self-confessed “fixer” -someone intent on fixing others rather than working on herself. Guilty.
She didn’t want to tell others her feelings because of her rocky relationship with her husband. Same. I still keep things pent up and don’t share much with the outside world. I put much more inner truth on this blog than anywhere else and there are still a few things I am not blogging about these days.
People think I am an open book because I will chatter on about my life, day-to-day stuff, but rarely will I spout about my feelings. Nope, not sharing. Between my borderline personality mother, absentee father and emotionally abusive husband, I keep my inner feelings locked up tight where I occasionally take them out to look at and then usually stuff them back inside. Not the healthiest thing to do and I need to do better.
The book left me thinking and spending today listening to the Avett Brothers. I got out of the shitty marriage. I am safe. I am happy. I am oh so blessed these days. Time to unpack the emotions and let them have some room to show themselves. It’s OK.
Get the book. It is much lighter than perhaps I am describing it. I need to put Maine on my bucket list for sure….