"Love My Way, It's a New Road"

Standing on the Edge

I spent Saturday working on my numbers.  I went through the past eight months of bank statements, credit card statements and logged in all of my expenses with categories so I can FINALLy figure out where the hell my $$ are going.

It was eye-opening.  I have spent Sunday and today thinking about what I have learned.  I still have more to figure out, but the Big Picture is not pretty.  It’s a combination of good news and bad news.

Bad News:

  • Maggie & Co has some serious overhead even though I have made cuts.  I spend a lot of money on health insurance (unavoidable) and on some business necessities that I simply can’t forego.  Between my car payment, gas, auto insurance, I am spending a lot of money on that category (over $800/month).  I don’t even drive a fancy car for crying out loud.
  • I am spending more than I am earning which explains that sucking noise I am continually hearing — it’s all my savings being sucked out of my account.
  • I’m balanced on the edge right now.  I have money coming in, but the question is how fast?  Will I fall off the edge before I receive it?  That could keep me awake at night!  It’s too soon to say, but I need to crunch the numbers a bit more.

That’s the doom and gloom I am digesting at the moment. One thing that Dave Ramsey says is sometimes the only solution is to generate more income.  I need to do that.  I need a side hustle to help take some pressure off  Maggie & Co.  The Hunter needs to join me in our search for the almighty dollar.  Having said all of that, there is some good news:

  • I didn’t have too much fluff in my numbers.  I have some subscriptions and frills that I can dump.  It won’t be a huge savings, but it will help.  This just shows me that all my cost-cutting measures were necessary.
  • I haven’t spent anything on credit cards in months.
  • I am ready to sell some old jewelry and the last time I got an estimate it was worth $5,000 and I didn’t trust the buyer.  Even if I just get the $5k, that will help get my emergency savings funded and start paying down my debt.
  • The Hunter is standing by ready to help.  He is ready to push this boulder up the hill with me.  I just need to sit down with him, walk through the numbers and create a budget we both agree with.

My low point was this morning.  I’m already a tad cranky as I am trying to create some space to think about my numbers while I still push through work.  Then I had a bleep with a major resource for Maggie & Co.  I couldn’t log on.  Do I owe them $$?  Yes, I was three months behind with Month 3 due tomorrow.  The number I owed made me burst into frustrated tears — over $2,000.  Yes, this shit is that expensive.  Fortunately I was able to pay two months of it and log on, but I need to get current with the balance.  Right after I dealt with that, the bank called about an automatic payment that didn’t go through.  Sigh.

I look ahead to the income that is coming in over the next couple of months, even the next 30 days, and I will be fine.  I’m just in a really tight spot right now.  The Hunter just landed a new client that will help and I think will be a great referral source in a couple of months.

Breathe, that’s all I can do.  Breathe and exercise and just keep working hard.  Now, anybody got any good side hustle ideas?  I’m open to ideas!


Photo by Samuel Scrimshaw on Unsplash


Comments on: "Standing on the Edge" (2)

  1. I feel your pain. Today I had unexpected costs, not huge at all, but… I’m at the stage where even not huge is too big. Sigh! All I can do is keep working and do my best, and… BREATHE!.
    Hang in there, we’ll make it through!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I feel for you too — it doesn’t take much to upset the apple cart. I have calmed down…until then my accountant called looking for more $$ so he can file my quarterly taxes. Sigh. I keep telling myself that it will all be OK and it will be.

      Liked by 1 person

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