The Hunter broke up with me. Rather he questioned our relationship status, opened the door of breaking up and I stepped through it. Our relationship had not recovered from my coffee with Don Juan. He suspected that I was seeing the guy and his trust evaporated.
Actually the subterfuge that he sensed (and he is a very astute man) is my dissatisfaction with our relationship and my shift to making plans to end the relationship. I went back to my therapist last week to has through things and figure out if I am, in fact, done or if I want to mend things.
Yes, I know that he’s reading this, but I now have no secrets. No secrets of any sort. We have had some long, meaningful discussions of our relationship and how it ran off the rails. There have been quite a few tears shed and they continue to fall from both of us.
I am fragile right now. I feel broken and lost for the most part. Yesterday was hard, today is a bit better, but still tears are below the surface and ready to erupt at any moment.
Here is what I know about the Hunter. He truly loves me. He really does. He accepts me for me. He is profoundly sorry for the pain that he has caused me. He has looked inside and seen how he has contributed to some of the problems in our relationship. He has proven to me that I can talk to him about anything and that I should have been doing this all along. I didn’t open up about the true extent of my work struggles and when I did, it made us both teary. I’m teary just writing all of this.
I don’t know the next step. I do know that big changes will be taking place. Oh and that asshole of a client who was the catalyst for my introspection – he has offered a full apology. He also completely misread the entire situation.