"Love My Way, It's a New Road"

I’ve been busy and must apologize for not writing, but life has been hectic. Last week I had a eureka moment with the Hunter that I wanted to share with you, Dear Readers. The Hunter was working on repairing our fence because of the new puppy — oh yes, I’ll tell you about the puppy later. Anyway, the chain-link fence had some holes that were perfect for a puppy to scoot through. The Hunter got some wire fencing and was attaching it to the existing fence line with zip ties. He was working away and doing his usual thorough, methodical, thoughtful job and making it look effortless.

I popped outside to give him some water and see how it was going. The puppy was sprawled in the shade. The Hunter was almost done and it looked great. I was watching him work on the final hole and I noticed that another piece of fence was loose from the top of the frame. I pointed it out to him and he came over and added a couple of zip ties to secure it better.

Later he laughed about it because he said that the zip ties were only there to make me happy and wouldn’t affect the fence’s performance. The Hunter went on to say that sometimes you need to do things in a relationship that you know don’t really matter in the vast scheme of things, but you know they will make your partner happy. Like zip ties on a small section of fence. I found that immensely profound.

He’s right. Sometimes it’s important to do things for your partner just to let them know that you care. It doesn’t matter one iota, but it makes them happy. I know that I can be bossy. Yes, bossy, which I know is somewhat of an anti-feminist term these days. But I am. I have an opinion and will voice it in the belief that my solution is the only one or the best one. I have to remind myself to sit back and take a breath because 1) not everyone needs/wants my solutions 2) oftentimes my advice is for adults and they can figure it out without me taking control of the situation 3) I need to conserve my time and energy on things that matter to me first and foremost. The Hunter takes my bossiness in stride. He recognizes that my bossiness comes from a place of care and concern, so sometimes he puts a couple of zip ties on the fence just to make me happy.

Now about the puppy — he is an adorable terror. The Kracken, as he will be known here, arrived at 6 weeks of age and just over 5 pounds. He is now about 9 weeks old and over 12 pounds. He is a hound mix with a howling bark that is beautiful to hear. The Kracken talks back to us both when scolded (oh yes, it’s ridiculous) so we have our hands full with him. He’s terrorizing my ancient Lhasa Apso, but I think the Lhasa is secretly enjoying it occasionally. He chases the Lhasa and grabs his feathery tail like he’s grabbing a wild boar (that’s his breeding). The Lhasa fusses and then they start again. Yes, we intercede after a few minutes.  

This puppy is a snapshot of child rearing for us and we are endlessly amused watching the other parent. I have firm expectations, use diversionary tactics or a quick swat when inappropriate behavior occurs and read books on puppy training incessantly.  The Hunter is full of love and patience, then he yells and stomps his foot. He listens to my ideas and tries them all.  The Kracken talks back, we all giggle and start again. God help us. Like I have time for this? But the dog is so smart, so very smart and we are fortunate to work from home so he’s getting the very best start a puppy could want. Plus he’s got a very secure backyard to play in thanks to the Hunter and his zip ties.


Comments on: "Zip Ties and Relationships" (2)

  1. mbluna11gmailcom said:

    Enjoy that sweet pup, love the name!! Our crazy lil beagle is the very thing that gets me moving daily especially when I so have no desire to move!! There’s nothing better than puppy breath kisses on a “ruff” day!!! I’ve been married for close to 35 years and found myself agreeing with your “zip tie” story. I can so relate. Also what is it with zip ties and men??!!! My hubby has repaired many things over our years with zip ties and I must admit I’ve gotten into his stash at times as well. Thanks for sharing you’ve made my day!!


    • Thank you! I think zip ties are in the same league as duct tape! The Kracken is so adorable and when he is good, he is oh so good! When he is bad, I still find him exasperatingly adorable.


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