"Love My Way, It's a New Road"

So let’s get to the point, let’s roll another joint
Let’s head on down the road
There’s somewhere I gotta go
And you don’t know how it feels
You don’t know how it feels to be me

Last dance with Mary Jane, one more time to kill the pain
I feel summer creepin’ in and I’m tired of this town again

Well, I don’t know, but I’ve been told
You never slow down, you never grow old
I’m tired of screwin’ up, tired of going down
Tired of myself, tired of this town

Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers

It appears that the Hunter may need to find a new job. His current employer just lost a government contract that could potentially put his job at risk. The Hunter is savvy enough to realize that he needs to start making his own plans so he isn’t caught off guard by an unexpected layoff, although the thought of unemployment doesn’t spook him like it would me.

Thus far we have written his resume so he has a good one that he can send out. He applied for a government job but didn’t make the cut, but neither of us was surprised. The next major step in his job seeking program is to stop smoking pot. That will be the ultimate challenge for him because he smokes every day. He knows that any job will require a drug test and he knows that it will take more than 30 days to clear the marijuana out of his system. The Hunter is quite realistic.

This weekend we took advantage of the last beautiful, cool temperatures to go camping. We went back to our New Year Eve’s rendezvous and it was a lovely weekend. We were driving back and chatting about a variety of topics. We talked about his truck which has over 150K miles on it. He needs a new one, particularly since he is commuting 90 miles round trip every day in order to live with me. Not that he’s complaining, but it will take a serious toll on his truck. I did a little math and realized that if he put more money down, even with his bad credit, we might be able to get him a much newer truck for the same payment he has right now. We both reflected on that for several miles.

Then he began talking about quitting pot. This past weekend was his last hoorah. I learned two surprising facts I didn’t know before. One, he smokes in the morning before work. Second, his habit is about $300 a month. Good grief, it’s his car payment. He talked about the necessity of quitting in order to get a new job and how quitting would also save him a lot of money.  The Hunter has been smoking less since he moved in with me and he has quit for long periods of time in the past.  I listened carefully and then chimed in with my thoughts which were:

• My Ex was a cigarette smoker and he tried quitting regularly. He actually quit for four years one time but he relapsed when his father was dying of cancer…cancer that ironically was caused by smoking, but I digress. None of this was shared with the Hunter other than I have lived with someone kicking a habit, so I know what is about to happen.
• I told him that I would never nag him or guilt him if he relapsed because I know that quitting is very difficult.
• I would do whatever he asked of me in order to help him. If he needed new activities, exercise, whatever was needed to fill the gap, I am game to help.
• Then I had my bigger idea. I said that if he wanted, and only if he wanted, he could give me the money he normally spent on pot. I would set it aside in a special account for him. If he stayed clean, it would be used towards the new truck. If not, we would determine in advance what would happen to the money. He said to give it to his son because that would annoy the hell out of him. I found that hilarious.

Regardless of whether he gives me the money as a method to keep him clean, we are about to embark on a new level of our relationship – living through the kicking of an addiction. Good grief, I may be the one to start smoking pot. Fortunately, I did a little research today and it appears that it is easier to quit marijuana than cigarettes, cocaine, and possibly alcohol. I also learned that most symptoms begin within 24 to 48 hours of abstinence, peak within 4 to 6 days, and last from 1 to 3 weeks. Of course, this varies from person to person. The symptoms include irritability, anger, depression, difficulty sleeping, craving, and decreased appetite. This week could be a rollercoaster since we have the added bundle of joy also known as my son joining us for the latter part of the week.  Now let’s see how the Hunter is with his follow through.

It’s never a dull moment in my world…


Comments on: "Mary Jane’s Last Dance" (1)

  1. […] Hunter has not smoked pot in about four weeks. He smoked two joints during a weekend in the woods, but prior to that he had […]


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