"Love My Way, It's a New Road"

I’ll Tell You Want I Want

o, I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really really really wanna zigazig ha.

If you want my future forget my past,
If you wanna get with me better make it fast,
Now don’t go wasting my precious time,
Get your act together we could be just fine

Spice Girls

If you have been following along this past week, you’ll know that I have been wrestling with my relationship and communication with Don Juan. As an aside, if 2015 is going to continue like the past week, my resolve of a Sober January will be severely tested and I am in for a rollercoaster of epic proportions. In any case, I used my words like a mature adult and sent him an email after our initial text exchange.

Don Juan, I have to get this off my chest. I was really happy to hear from you today because I thought you had forgotten me. After 2 texts and 2 emails went unanswered, I was hurt and disappointed. Seriously – not even a Merry Christmas or a Happy New Year from you? I deserve better. I appreciate your texts and apology today – that’s your first step, but here’s what I need (and deserve) going forward:
1) please reach out to me either text or call. 5-10 minutes of connecting with me once a day or every other day goes a long way with me.
2) let’s go have a nice, long dinner when you get back so we can reconnect and chat about the holidays, the families, etc. I know we both have tons of stories to tell.
3) well, that depends on how #1 and #2 goes and this will take place in the bedroom.
XXOO, Maggie

I thought I struck a balance between stating my feelings and needs without become bitchy and whiny. Apparently it worked because I sent it around 6:00 pm and before noon the next day, Don Juan responded with the following.

I respect and acknowledge your feelings. I should’ve made you aware of the fact that I don’t text or email when I’m with my family. Maybe you haven’t noticed that before, but then again I haven’t been away for that long, so I apologize again. I’m alone in X (second home) so I have no problem in contacting you.
Looking forward to steps 2 and 3. Do you really think a nice long dinner with you can go wrong?

First of all, I have to say that I am pleased that he has apologized not once or twice, but three times. To me that indicates that he is sensitive to my feelings. His response also contained a very important fact – he has completely compartmentalized his life and I am one of those boxes whose contents will not be mixed with other boxes. The question will become if I can live with that. Perhaps. I did go into this looking for a FWB.

Obviously we need to discuss this face-to-face, so that will wait until this weekend. In the meantime, we have been communicating. During the week I sent him some business related information from my work email and he was very appreciative. On Saturday we bantered and texted for over an hour.

That text exchange actually was interesting. I was willing to let him off after about 5 minutes. I even pretty much signed off, but he came back with something that warranted a philosophical dialogue. Then I mentioned that I read the book he recommended. He was thrilled. He was planning on giving it to me when he returned. Then he was teasing that dinner was going to be longer and he wasn’t sure he liked that idea.

I countered by revealing my goal of a Sober January. I am going to have to do a separate post about this Sober January thing because it is getting a lot of discussion in my real life. My work group is doing it, my Facebook is exploding about my declaration.  I am really getting a lot of commentary about this which warrants perhaps a post so you can weigh in as well.

In any case, our banter was delightful and I am pleased….for now. My thought is that Don Juan is great for now but he is not any type of long-term relationship perhaps even in the FWB category. Who knows??? I am learning so much in this new chapter of my life that I can’t predict anything. In the meantime, The Hunter texted me last night from his remote campsite (OK, not so remote that he doesn’t have cell coverage) and I have a couple of new prospects in the preliminary stages. Gotta keep that pipeline full.


Comments on: "I’ll Tell You Want I Want" (6)

  1. I don’t know how you do it. I don’t think I’m ready to pursue many people at once. What I really want, eventually, is a relationship. And I don’t know that I can be open to so many people at once.
    But mind you, I’m very new on the dating scene, as it’s only been a month or so. So I’ll see. In time, I may start to do like you 😉
    Good luck with everything.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am celebrating my girlfriend’s birthday and she agrees with you. She has no idea how I juggle these guys. I actually find this easy compared to my active Ashley Madison days. I just feel that by continuing to play the field by having various guys at various stages, I don’t get fixated on one man who may not be ready for more. Make sense?

      Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s my point. I am reluctant to have only one guy in my sights because what if he doesn’t pan out and i have to start from scratch? I’m 50 – my time is limited (just kidding….sort of)!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I guess, for now, I’d rather wait and see. But I get you have a different approach. Maybe I’ll be there later on, when I get tired of the game 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Haha. I totally get what you are saying. I enjoy the juggle though.


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