"Love My Way, It's a New Road"


I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath
Scared to rock the boat and make a mess
So I sat quietly, agreed politely
I guess that I forgot I had a choice
I let you push me past the breaking point
I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything

I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire
‘Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me roar
Louder, louder than a lion
‘Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me roar

Katy Perry

This weekend was very interesting. Since it’s Monday, it’s time for Maggie to have a bitchy Monday rant. This rant will be about one douche bag from Plenty of Fish. Actually I had two and I’ll post about the other guy separately. This person, who will be forever known as Douchebag Dave or DD, deserves his own, very special post because we all are going to have some fun with him. So settle back and prepare for your brain to explode.

I reached out to DD on POF and we had a nice little exchange leading to exchange of phone numbers. We talk on Friday night for 1-1/2 hours and the conversation flowed very easily. Wow, a nice, normal guy on POF. I was quite happy.

POF Slide 4

I go about my business which includes popping back up onto POF to see what’s up and here is my buddy DD. The first part is the earlier conversation about calling him. Then he drops this one.

POF Slide 1

I realize there is a certain awkwardness that occurs after a great chat and you see that person up on the dating site. So I decide to just call it what it is and even attempt to assuage him.

POF Slide 2

Then a hint of the crazy to come begins, but I fail to recognize it.

POF Slide 3

The next morning I awake to a really weird text and for some reason, instead of saying you are crazy (which is beginning to stir around in the recesses of my caffeine deprived mind), I actually try to diffuse the situation. Always the pleaser, aren’t I.

POF Slide 4a

Since he even says that he is teasing me, so I tell my alarm-ringing gut to calm down.

POF Slide 5

Sunday night is our appointed time to chat and make plans for tonight. I had a long day hiking (future post) and then Don Juan asked to come over and massage the cramp in my butt which resulted in a delicious full body massage. When he leaves, I have this lovely jewel waiting for me.

POF Slide 6

This is creepy on all levels. Every time I am online, he is. The guy has a creepy stalker vibe. Plus how dare he attempt to slut shame me when he is doing the same thing. I am pissed. Part of me wants to tell him that after talking on Friday, I sexted with another POF guy until he came, but meh, that buys into his whole theory. OK, I really did sext with a POF guy until he came – no big deal, I don’t want to date him, I just wanted to play and the playing happened on Kik, not POF. But I digress. Let’s get back to the ANGER! You can see that I send him a rational, mature response. No harm, no foul. He responds with this:

POF Slide 7

I WAS BEING TESTED?!  Few women have self control?!  Are you kidding me?! So dear Readers, let’s fuck with this guy. Please comment below your response to this douche bag. We will select the favorite and I will happily text it back to him. Entries will be closed by noon tomorrow. Let the fireworks begin.


Comments on: "Roar" (2)

  1. “Oh, what a coincidence. I was testing, too. F Baby. A big fucking F”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Sorry, I was holding auditions and you didn’t get your call back. No need to cry over spilt milk.

    Liked by 1 person

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